Wednesday, July 16, 2008

Campaign Approved Jokes

The Borowitz Report received recently a list of "official Barack Obama" campaign jokes that comedians can incorporate into their routines. Since they are free, I will post them all:
Barack Obama and a kangaroo pull up to a gas station. The gas station attendant takes one look at the kangaroo and says, "You know, we don't get many kangaroos here." Barack Obama replies, "At these prices, I'm not surprised. That's why we need to reduce our dependence on foreign oil."

A traveling salesman knocks on the door of a farmhouse, and much to his surprise, Barack Obama answers the door. The salesman says, "I was expecting the farmer's daughter." Barack Obama replies, "She's not here. The farm was foreclosed on because of subprime loans that are making a mockery of the American Dream."

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Why the long face?" Barack Obama replies, "His jockey just lost his health insurance, which should be the right of all Americans."

Q: What's black and white and red all over?
Barack Obama: The New Yorker magazine, which should be embarrassed after publishing such a tasteless and offensive cover, which I reject and denounce.

A Christian, a Jew and Barack Obama are in a rowboat in the middle of the ocean. Barack Obama says, "This joke isn't going to work because there's no Muslim in this boat."

Okay, back to work. Kid B is on the way. Well, he/she will arrive sometime this summer. Maybe in two weeks, maybe in six. You can just never tell....

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

I just laughed so hard that Kid B almost arrived right now.

Oxymoron said...

Ha!

supadiscomama said...

Not an Obama joke, but fun nonetheless (a blast from the past, if you will):

John Kerry walked into a bar. The bartender asked, "Why the long face?"

Seth Meyers was robbed by the 2004 election