Monday, July 13, 2009

Sotomayor pledges love for puppies... and kittens

Sonia Sotomayor confirmations hearings began today.

A CNN story on the hearings started with the following line:
U.S. Supreme Court nominee Sonia Sotomayor said Monday that her hotly disputed judicial philosophy is, in fact, quite simple: Remain faithful to the law.

All of this means is that Sotomayor does not kick puppies. Furthermore, she likes them. In fact, if given the right opportunity, she will pet them. And, while petting one, she will remain faithful to petting it, ensuring maximum happiness for the said puppy.

She also does not spit on the baby Jesus. Nor does she use the Constitution to clean the kitchen counter by the coffee maker.

When in Athens....

If no one is going to make this confirmation process a serious discussion of the Constitution or of the laws, just confirm her already.


Oxymoron said...

It's against the law to kick puppies?

solon said...

Not necessarily though it may be if you kick the puppy hard enough.

Of course, it appears that you may not have too much empathy if you kick a puppy, especially if it is a cute puppy. And if you do not have empathy, you are not worthy for the Supreme Court.

Oxymoron said...

Well, what if the puppy pooped in my yard? And moreover, what if I'm a cat person?

Who's gonna show empathy for me and my situation? Just because Sotomayor comes from a background of dog-lovers, she shouldn't let that influence her decision to criminalize canine-kicking.