God, the NBA Playoffs last a long time.
A couple of days ago Harrogate was watching the opening ceremonies for a game between (he thinks) the Celtics and the Cavaliers. There was much pomp and circumstance, of course, with the Introduction of the Home Team, replete with fireworks and big light shows and splashy music and a Jumbotron festival of highlights.
Walking into the room, noticing all the hoopla, supadiscomama innocently and, when you think about it, quite reasonably, asked if this was the "last game"? As there really wasn't a good response to the question, Harrogate resignedly said something to the effect of "no," and left it at that.
But one thing about these here playoffs, they sure do inspire some vitriol on the ESPN Message Boards. Only a brief visitation of several of the team sites, this time of year, will put in perspective the comparatively tame sniping that has occured across the political blogosphere between Obama and Clinton supporters.
Here, for example is a sampling of some reconfigured team appellatives, as rendered by hostile fans. Some, obviously are more better than others:
Detroit Pistons = Detroit Pissed-Ons
Phoenix Suns = Kleenex Sons (Spurs fans particularly revel in this one, and seem especially happy at being able to use the city as well as the team in their construction)
Boston Celtics = Boston Smelt-Its
Los Angeles Lakers = Los Angeles Fakers (that one's pretty easy, yes?)
Orlando Magic = Orlando Tragic
New Orleans Hornets = [That's Right] New Orleans Whorenets
San Antonio Spurs = San Antonio Sterns (this one's a bit more cerebral, implying NBA Commisioner David Stern's favoritism towards that team)
Utah Jazz = Utah Jizz
But so far, Harrogate has seen no attempt to appropriate Cleveland Cavaliers.
6 comments:
Sorry had to delete my previous comment, unreadable gibberish. Nonetheless, Utah jizz-brilliant. The Cavs is a much harder one, must reflect upon this. The duration of the playoff process, not just basketball, is a sad state of affairs. But the way these series have been played, although they are a bit predictable, it has been nice to see everyone get their asses beat without one team standing out. When a team finally wins a road game, then it will get really interesting.
Tell me more about this game of basketball.... Is this the game where is takes sixty minutes (real-time) to play the first 90% of the game and 120 minutes to play the last 10% of the game?
The comments are clever...
Not everything is great as that ice game thingy.
Solon - I once compared reading *Tristam Shandy* to watching basketball. Sterne's narrator keeps promising that Tristam will be born soon, but 200+ pages into the novel, the main character still hasn't been born. It reminded me of when there's 5 minutes left on an NBA clock, and an hour later the game is still on tv.
I didn't make it through the whole novel, and I rarely make it through a whole basketball game (unless, of course, the Tarheels are playing).
I have to say I've never understood the practice of fouling your opponents in the final seconds of the game in an attempt to get possession of the ball and, thus, win. This happens in every freakin' game I've ever seen, and it rarely works--it does, however, make 2 minutes become 20. But, Solon, your preferred sport of football isn't much different. With timeouts and such, the final 2 minutes can quickly become 30.
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