Oxy?

Before we handle the annual APB for Harrogate, we must address this question, which deserves to be taken seriously:

Oxy? Where are you?

Assy McGee Award® for 3/13/09: Paul Edwards

The piece is entitled "How I'm Praying for the President."
Just. Wow.

Representative Spewage:

Based on the policy positions alone, there is solid evidence that Barack Obama has made himself an enemy of God and the enemy of God’s people.

An Ideologue Responds to Bristol Palin's Interview, Declares it an Uncomfortable Experience

Recently, Supadiscomama celebrated Bristol Palin's handling of her first television interview--particularly Britol's refreshing acknowledgment that abstinence-only education is unrealistic, and her assertion of personal choice with regards to her own pregnancy.

As Sarah Palin remains a model for all that the Republican Party ought to be in the eyes of Townhall bloggers, it was only a matter of time before one of them would break the silence on Bristol's interview, and go into spin control mode.

Asserting that the interview was awkward and "painful to get through," Ericka Andersen today writes that:

In between eye aversions and like, not wanting to get into personal details, Bristol gave us no more insight than a typical confession segment on the Real World. She said she wanted to "prevent" teen pregnancy but called abstinence an "unrealistic" way to think because "its more accepted now" to have sex outside of marriage at a young age. Van Susteren reminded that Bristol's mother supports abstinence-only education. Bristol sounded just like herself -- a teenager who just had a baby out of wedlock.

The money component of all of this is of course the implication that a pregnant, unmarried teenager is hardly qualified to weigh in on the desireability or effectiveness of abstinence-only education.

"So Bristol Palin has spoken and Tripp has been seen by the world," Andersen concludes, compassionately adding: "Here's to hoping I avoid anymore cringe-worthy interviews like this one."

Rough when hard doctrine runs up against the human experience one supposes. If only there were no people out there, everything would be perfect.


FORTUITOUS UPDATE

The gates appear to have opened on denying Bristol Palin's credibility on the cultural issue which she has, largely through the efforts of people like Marybeth Hicks, come to emblematize. Hicks in this column disparages the notion of realism altogether when it comes to unmarried teen sex. She offers the totally applicable analogy of a parent expecting their kids to put their shoes in the desginated spot by the door, even with the full knowledge that kids will keep putting shoes where they want.

This snippet here perfectly illustrates Hicks' impregnable (heh) reasoning:

Miss Palin may think her parents' advice regarding abstinence was unrealistic, but I think that was the 18-year-old daughter talking.

The 18-year-old mother will soon discover that unrealistic expectations drive the parenting bus.

With time and experience, perhaps she'll discover that we parents have another name for those unrealistic expectations. We call them "ideals."

Again, the sheer doctrinal hubris of these people, their willingness to dismiss reality itself even as they insist the right to appropriate the ideals of "we parents," is simply stunning.

Smells like dinner!

Maths and You

I try to avoid FailBlog - based posts because, once started, I may never stop.

However, this is for the teachers in the room. Especially in this room of people who will protest that they aren't "math-people."

I have .002 dollars that says that we all subvocalize a scream at the same moment, at the same line, at the same illogical defense.

A long-winded response to "OMFG: A Tribute to Sarah Palin"

My "too long-winded for the comments box" reply to O'Reilly's interview with Carl cameron posted earlier today by solon.


Here's "O'Reilly Logic", at its most dipshitty:

1- "The woman's not a stupid woman," she just needed to be "tutored" in current events, basic government, geography, rhetoric, the English language, American and world history, what skills, experience, or duties she is supposed to have, how to read and remember the titles of things she has had "placed in front of her", the difference between "mine" and "yours", how to take criticism, how to answer the questions she is asked rather than talking about what she wants to, that you can't subtract $150k from $20k, and so forth.

So, she's not a stupid woman; she's a standard pre-kindergartener, really.

I defer to Robert Fulgham:

Share everything.
Play fair.
Don't hit people.
Put things back where you found them.
Clean up your own mess.
Don't take things that aren't yours.
Say you're sorry when you hurt somebody.
Wash your hands before you eat.
Flush.
Warm cookies and cold milk are good for you.
Live a balanced life - learn some and think some and draw and paint and sing and dance and play and work every day some.
Take a nap every afternoon.
When you go out in the world, watch out for traffic, hold hands and stick together.
Be aware of wonder. Remember the little seed in the Styrofoam cup: the roots go down and the plant goes up and nobody really knows how or why, but we are all like that.
Goldfish and hamsters and white mice and even the little seed in the Styrofoam cup - they all die. So do we.
And then remember the Dick-and-Jane books and the first word you learned - the biggest word of all - LOOK.
Everything you need to know is in there somewhere. The Golden Rule and love and basic sanitation. Ecology and politics and equality and sane living.

Take any one of those items and extrapolate it into sophisticated adult terms and apply it to your family life or your work or government or your world and it holds true and clear and firm. Think what a better world it would be if we all - the whole world - had cookies and milk at about 3 o'clock in the afternoon and then lay down with our blankies for a nap. Or if all governments had as a basic policy to always put things back where they found them and to clean up their own mess.

And it is still true, no matter how old you are, when you go out in the world, it is best to hold hands and stick together.

It shouldn't take her more than 12 years to bring her up-to-date with most high school graduates on these "the basics."

Then, 2- He forgives her not being able to name the title of anything in the media or exhibit differentiation "all" and "some" by saying, "She didn't want ot be bogged down by a lesson before" the interview.

So:
1) She's not a stupid woman
2) She can be tutored easily
3) They knew the questions that would be asked and prepared answers and information
4) Who the fuck has time to learn?
5) {omitted}
6) This is obviously not her fault

I'm going to call it now: O'Reilly has achieved "The Underwear Gnome Paradox", which is itself an offshoot of Johnny Cochran's infamous "Chewbacca Defense":

This is Chewbacca, Chewbacca is a Wookiee from the planet Kashyyyk, but Chewbacca lives on the planet Endor. Now, think about that. That does not make sense! Why would a Wookiee - an eight foot tall Wookiee - want to live on Endor with a bunch of two foot tall Ewoks? That does not make sense! What does that have to do with this case? Nothing. Ladies and gentlemen, it has nothing to do with this case! It does not make sense! None of this makes sense. If Chewbacca lives on Endor, you must acquit! The defense rests. DAMNIT!